Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Disappointments, Dreams, Discovery

This past weekend has been one of those times that make your head hurt because you are thinking too hard. I've been processing all this for a while, so I decided if I blog about it, I might get a better nights sleep.

Friday Dan and I tried out a highly recommended babysitter. Believe it or not it's from another family in my Moms of Multiples club in Arkansas! Their favorite babysitter left for college, and it's the school where Dan is teaching at. We left for two hours, the boys did well!

During those two hours we met with a Realtor to nail down the details of what we are looking for, where, etc. We excitedly got home and discussed all these details for hours that night. I woke up in the middle of the night and could not imagine we might be able to get our dream home. Saturday I woke up to an email that the loan was denied for our buyers on our Arkansas home only 8 days before closing.

I felt Deflated. Frustrated. Angry. Disappointed. Crushed. Mad.

Then my laptop died. My source of communication to the outside world! (yes, I am dramatic when it comes to my laptop) Especially since we have not been in TN long enough to meet friends yet. At least ALL my photos and digital scrapbooking is on my external drive. Nope, that would not pull up either.

I again felt very emotional.

Then I started praying to the Lord that I will react better in this situation. Don't take it out on others, don't speak before I think, just don't burst.

Then I thought of Bethany. And Amy. And Project Smile. I had to turn this around. People are dealing with far worse situations!

Yes, our dreams of things running smoothly had halted. Our seamless transition has a ripple. We are thankful once again that we are renting a home rather than having two mortgages to pay. We are thankful for our health. We are thankful for Dan's job.

It is still on my mind, trying to decide what I can do from 7 hours away to make the house sell faster. All the "what if"s are there. I am not perfect, I still struggle with all that.

Now I'm just really trying to put this all into perspective and look to the positive!!!

Here is a picture from our movie night I took with
my phone to send to the Grandparents.
Horton Hears a Who was pretty good, the boys sat through it fairly well!


Shawna said...

First of all, I love the picture and LOVE their pillow cases! :) I know it's been a hard weekend for you. You are in my prayers. Just know that God has a plan. Even when things don't go "our" way. He STILL has a plan. I know it's no fun when one thing after another seems to come crushing down. you are right to think of the positive and be thankful for what you DO have. Yet know it's okay to be emotional about things. We are human and that is how God created us to deal with things, with our emotions so know it's okay to feel those feelings as well. I love you dear and I can't wait to become a Tennessean (spelling??!?!!) with you! Then we can meet up when things aren't going so hot..and just relax together and have fun! Love ya dear! :)

lori bunk said...

i love you dee!

Dad/Granpa Slater said...

When I read your letter this morning my heart sank with your set-back, and even thou mom and I have been thru this and know it will turn around; it's also OK that you felt the emotions you did, working thru these things are nothing new to life, but it renews my joy in you guys to see how you are focusing on what you have. We will, of course be praying for you guys and you know that GOD is with you, but know this also; we are with you also! although you are in another state you are not alone and if I need to take time off work I will help you guys with your home in arkansas or anything else I can do, so that as they say is THAT!
Love You Guys COMPETELY, Dad/Grandpa

mom said...

It is perfectly OK to go thru all the different emotions you are experiencing. God can handle them. Whenever I get down and things hit me hard, listening to and singing praises to the Lord really gets my focus back on HIM and off my struggles. Of course, His Word is second to none. Please know you are all covered with prayer. ♥U
Isa 40:31; Phil 4:19, 13

Karen said...

Denise, God knows every desire and every need and every tear. He says in Exodus 3:7-8...   I have surely seen the affliction of my people... have heard their cry...; for I know their sorrows; And I am come down to deliver them..., and to bring them up out of that land unto a good land...

Many times just knowing the Lord sees and hears and knows and is there to bring me where I need to go is SUCH a comfort to me. Many times also, my largest disappointments turn around and the Lord often lifts up the cover and reveals to me that He was working out something better for me...

I love that you turned your thinking around too... I always say that it is ALWAYS okay to CRY -- as long as you CRY unto the Lord!

With you in prayer as you wait on Him!

Love, Karen

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